Punish your anus and permanently stain your bed sheets by bravely sprinkling in some “Shit The Bed” hot sauce onto your meals. It’s loaded with Scorpion chilies – the 3rd hottest chili in the world – along with a blend of varied herbs and spices.
Make mornings your bitch by properly fueling up for the day ahead using the all-in-one breakfast cooking station. This wonder-appliance lets you prepare everything from your cup of Joe to your toast, sausage, and eggs simultaneously.
Give an entirely new meaning to the term “man-made” by filling your tummy with delicious and nutritious meals made using the semen cookbook. The book comes filled with dozens of mouth-watering recipes like “slightly saltier caviar” and the “almost white Russian”.
Easily slather on some artery clogging layers of butter onto your toast by applying it using this magic butter knife. The ergonomic design incorporates a grater, curler, and slice into the edge so you can easily spread butter onto your hot bagel or toast.
Give pasta night an authentic touch by making your very own pasta with the Philips Viva pasta maker. It features a narrow space-saving design and automatically kneads and extrudes 2-3 servings of fresh pasta in just 18 minutes.
Take your taste buds for a walk on the wild side by sinking your teeth into an edible dehydrated zebra tarantula. Each little protein-packed critter comes fully boiled, dehydrated, and seasoned with a light hint of barbecue for an exotic taste.
Keep those farm fresh eggs on display and at hand with the spiral egg rack. The captivating design accommodates up to 20 medium to large sized eggs and allows you to stack them in order of freshness so you’re guaranteed a tasty meal.
Serve up restaurant quality burgers right from home by making them using this 8-in-1 burger patty press. It allows you to easily make 8 plump quarter pound hexagonal patties that measure about 3 inches across and that are 1 inch thick.
Mornings will never be the same once the ultimate breakfast machine enters your life. In just five minutes this glorious machine will make you a complete breakfast sandwich. It’s the delicious and cost effective way to clog your arteries from the comfort of home!
Achieve snack-time nirvana no matter how far away from the kitchen with the Nutella snack and drink combo. This handy and portable snack pack comes with the divine nectar known as Nutella and some equally delicious treats so you can pig out anytime.
After helping all the obese people off their floaties, Wall-E and Eve are here to help with your morning coffee. The Wall-E and Eve mug set are the novelty ceramic mugs designed to look like miniature versions of the most lovable robots you’ve ever met.
Take your drinking games from the frat house to the big leagues by upgrading to the moving beer pong robot. This motorized device holds up to 5 plastic red cups and moves all around the table – dramatically increasing the difficulty of the shot.
Carry an entire three course meal in one hand at your next cookout using this food and beverage plate. It’s made from sturdy resin polypropylene and is designed to fit most cans and cups so that you can always have one hand free to stuff more food in your fat mouth.
Give your tasty cocktails a stunning visual component using these smokey dry ice drink stirrers. Each stirrer is designed to hold food-safe dry ice that creates a billowing smoke cloud around the surface of your drink when inserted.
Now with the giant liquor flask you’ll be able to stay fully inebriated no matter how far you are from the nearest bar. While subtlety isn't the strong point of this stainless steel flask, its enormous size stores up to one gallon of your favorite spirit so you’ll never be sober again.