Wearables


Canine Anxiety Relief System

Keep your canine companion from freaking out during stressful situations by using this canine anxiety relief system. The harness fits comfortably over the torso to deliver acoustic and vibration therapy designed to relax your stressed-out pooch.

$129.99
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Death Metal Rainbow Shirt

Look downright intimidating when you show up to see your favorite hardcore band wearing this death metal rainbow shirt. After all, nothing says you’re a soulless spawn of Satan quite like a dainty rainbow over a sea of pastel pink.

$8.88
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Secret Decoder Ring

Ensure your highly classified messages remain unseen from prying eyes by sending them using the secret decoder ring. This elegant stainless steel ring features a sleek nickel finish and allows you to send top secret information without anyone being the wiser.

$17.99
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Wireless Remote Control Neck Massager

Treat yourself to a soothing rub whenever the mood strikes using the wireless remote control neck massager. At the push of a button, you can customize massage settings while the Far Infrared Ray provides a gentle warmth that penetrates bone and muscle tissue.

$89.99
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Pet Pouch Hoodie

Keep your little furry friend warm and cozy while you relax by placing him inside the pet pouch hoodie. The sweater comes with a soft and snug kangaroo-like pouch that is designed for maximum comfort while you snuggle up with your best friend.

$14.99
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Sexy Chest Swimsuit

Transform your undesirable hourglass figure into a smoking hot dad bod by baring it all in this sexy chest swimsuit. This stellar one piece conceals and transforms your torso into that of a devastatingly handsome middle-aged man with a thick coat hair.

$44.95
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Alarm Clock Vibrator

The best part of waking up isn’t a cup of Folgers – it’s this alarm clock vibrator! This bedside companion will wake you up slowly and pleasurably by stimulating your clitoris with thirty different power levels for the ultimate in precision pleasure.

$99.99
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Baby Mop Onesie

Teach your kid a strong work ethic at a young age with the baby mop onesie. Not only will your baby learn the importance of cleanliness, but he will also get an ab defining workout as he crawls across the floor picking up dirt and trash.

$44.95
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Paracord Charging Cable

This paracord charging cable is the ideal way to help your devices remain charged when you head outdoors. This two-foot charging cable features waterproof caps at both ends to protect the cable from the elements and unravels into 20 feet of usable paracord.

$19.99
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Lighter Ring

The consummate gentleman always has a lighter to please his lady friends. Sometimes the gentleman does forget his lighter in his smoking jacket when he’s out on the town. Avoid this terrible faux-pas with the lighter ring, and you’ll never displease the ladies.

$6.50
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Artificial Intelligence Personal Trainer

Help meet your fitness goals by staying motivated and focused using this artificial intelligence personal trainer. The ergonomic design fits comfortably in your ears to provide you with a tailored fitness plan as well as real-time insights to improve workout efficiency.

$245.90
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Belt Buckle Beer Holder

One-up those fancy bottle opening belts with the belt buckle beer holder. This one of a kind buckle acts like an extra appendage by providing a nice and cozy place for you to place your bottle or can of beer so that your hands remain free for holding more beer.

$29.99
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Hands Free Baby Bottle Holder

Make feeding time a little easier on yourself by using this hands free baby bottle holder. The ingenious design holds the bottle at just the right angle so that junior can drink comfortably while allowing you to keep your other hand free.

$34.95
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Did You Feed The Dog?

Avoid accidentally starving your pooch by relying on this dog feeding daily reminder board. Constructed from high-impact ABS plastic, it’s easily mountable and comes with an “A.M.” and “P.M.” section that helps you keep track of things so you don’t overfeed Rex.

$9.95
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11 Pocket Gear Holding Vest

Carry around all your gear without feeling encumbered with this multi-pocket gear holding vest from Scottevest. This incredibly handy vest has so many pockets that you’ll probably end up losing many items when you forget that you left them in this vest!

$69.99
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